The five love languages of couples can easily be translated into the language of corporate caring. … (+)
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It goes without saying that today’s combative workplaces are becoming increasingly toxic. Recent studies have shown that amid mass return-to-office orders, workplace relationships are fraying, productivity is declining, and sometimes even escalating into resentment and conflict. The tug-of-war, division, and distrust between the corporate world and American workers is reflected in “hush-up workplace trends” such as “coffee badges,” “hush-up leave,” and “hush-up hybrids.”
Mural CEO David Baga said in an email that nearly three in five employees are considering leaving their jobs due to a lack of team alignment, explaining the need to change how they interact with each other and show up to work. More business leaders are expressing concern about the widening gap between employers and employees, and are focused on unifying their organizations so that everyone feels valued and appreciated.
5 Corporate Love Languages
Historically, big companies have perpetuated the myth that kindness eats into profits. Hard skills are favored over soft skills, making it harder for companies to turn a profit. But kindness is making a comeback among younger workers. According to one source, 77% of younger workers are more likely to apply to a job ad that lists “kindness” as a key company value.
Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages for Couples can be translated into a corporate language of caring, compassion, and connection to unify today’s chaotic workplace, whether you’re a CEO, manager, or team member. All five languages of kindness can set you apart and make you memorable as a valuable asset to your organization.
Words of affirmation. Communicate gratitude, encouragement, kindness, humility, empathy, and try to see the world through your colleague’s eyes. When a colleague is feeling down, offer words of encouragement, say “well done” or “nicely done,” or offer affirmation. When someone finishes a project or meets a deadline, you might give them a thumbs up. Or, give verbal praise or compliments or write congratulations to someone who has achieved a professional goal. You might also send a text or email expressing condolences when another professional experiences a loss. Quality time. Spending quality time through empathy and understanding can help you overcome communication barriers in the workplace. It involves giving your colleague your full attention and listening wholeheartedly. Have meaningful conversations. Don’t interrupt, judge, correct, advise, or try to fix your colleague. Approach your colleague yourself instead of waiting for someone to approach you. Invite your colleague to lunch and spend quality time getting to know each other.Bring curiosity into the conversation and ask them about their weekend. Or, if you hear something that happened in their personal life, show genuine interest to know more about what is important to them. Physical touch. In its original form between couples, this affection includes physical intimacy in the form of hugs, kisses, snuggles, hand-holding, and back-rubbing. Touch is calming and releases oxytocin. It reflects our common humanity, creates safety and trust, and lays the foundation for resolving differences. Naturally, compassion and sympathy in the workplace must be expressed in a professional manner. Appropriate physical touch is a powerful way to convey sympathy and kindness without saying a word. Scientists have found that gentle touching when communicating with someone, such as asking a stranger for directions, can elicit more support from the other person. A handshake, a pat on the back, or a light touch on the arm indicates a connection between colleagues. And depending on the work relationship, even a gentle hug between close friends at work can be an appropriate expression of connection. Acts of service. Given the chaos in the workplace this year, there are plenty of opportunities to perform kind acts of service during the week. When was the last time you performed a kind act for your boss, employee, or coworker? Did you bring them coffee, help a colleague struggling to meet a deadline, help them carry something heavy, leave a bagel or flowers on their desk, or bake their favorite dessert? Research shows that small acts like buying coffee for a colleague can make them feel better. Research also shows that caring acts increase happiness in both the giver and the recipient, and that these acts can be contagious. Recipients of acts of service tend to be more generous to anonymous people than non-recipients. So if you decide that a kind act is not important to your coworker, research shows you should rethink it. It could mean a lot to your coworker and lift their mood. Receive gifts. Give and receive money or gifts that show your appreciation, or send someone a token of your appreciation or condolences. Many companies discourage employees from accepting expensive gifts, and in some cases, it can be illegal. But sending a work friend flowers when they’re sick or buying them a holiday or birthday gift is a great way to send the message that you care about your coworkers.
Creating a unified work culture
Over time, a toxic work culture can deteriorate into relationship breakdown or even contempt. Research by family therapist John Gottman has uncovered four warning signs that indicate impending marriage breakdown. These four red flags can signal a deterioration in trust and cooperation between employer and employee: Constant criticism (attacking) can lead to defensiveness (counterattacking) or stonewalling (removing yourself from the conversation altogether), which ultimately leads to contempt (feeling contemptuous or resentful of how others treat you).
When companies prioritize an employee-centric culture, they report that their employees are more engaged and more productive, stick around for longer, and outperform their competitors by 400%. A unified workplace benefits both employees and the bottom line. Companies that emotionally invest in their employees and listen to their needs build trust and a sense of belonging. Whether you’re an employer or employee, building meaningful personal relationships is a key antidote to today’s volatile job market. Listening more authentically, speaking less authoritatively, understanding colleagues’ perspectives, and practicing the five corporate love languages will create a culture where employees feel connected to one another and united in a common company goal.
