A man who admits to being “a bit stubborn and having a love affair” seeks advice after a “conflict” with his girlfriend over her weight – saying his “model” is “lacking…” body because he accused her of just being there. “
A former full-time male model turned to the internet for advice after his girlfriend pointed out his recent weight gain and accused him of “giving up” on his dreams.
OP (aka “Original Poster”) shared her story on Reddit’s AITA (“Am I the A–hole”) forum, saying she’s gained weight but doesn’t care about the extra weight. told. However, his other half seems to care about that much more than he does, causing problems in their relationship.
Read what happened and how Redditors responded.
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OP begins to explain her situation, recalling how she landed her dream role in New York City.
“I (M23) am a model in New York. When I was 19, I got a great contract opportunity and moved to New York while basically working my dream job. My girlfriend (F23) We’ve been dating for years. But we’ve been friends for longer, so she knew this was my dream. Now I’m working as a freelance model. He said before sharing that it was gone.
“Last year I gained a little weight. It’s not outrageous, but I don’t have those abs anymore. I have a little more guts now. I was 6-foot-1 and weighed about 160, but now I weigh about 190. I think it probably has something to do with the fact that I lost a lot of modeling work last year. To make up for the lack of income, I took a part-time job hosting at a restaurant,” the OP continued. He shared how his girlfriend coped with his weight gain.
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“A few nights ago, my girlfriend told me about my weight gain. It was the first time we talked about it seriously. “I was worried about that and didn’t want that, ‘to see me get a full beer belly,'” he said.
“Honestly, I’m happy just doing my hosting job. It’s less stressful and I have a more stable schedule. I told her this and she said I don’t have to. I told her I was repressing and giving up. She said she didn’t care that I was fat and that she shouldn’t comment on my body shape, but I was a model. She said it was because she was accusing her of being shallow, adding that they were currently at “conflict” after discussing the matter.
“I don’t think I fully believe that she’s really watching over my dreams,” he concluded, asking, “Am I terrible for not caring?”
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He added a few more points at the end of the original post to make sure responders had all the information.
“Info: My girlfriend was already in New York when we started dating. She loves New York, but if I hadn’t had a modeling career, she probably would have left by now for financial reasons. “I think it was,” he added.
“I’ve gained most of my weight in the past year,” he added. “I currently weigh 193 pounds, and with a little grit and love, I’ve managed to keep the weight off. This is mostly the result of cutting back on my gym intake and drinking more beer.”
After over 1.2,000 upvotes and over 320 comments, Reddit has decided that neither boyfriend nor girlfriend is completely wrong and there is no A-Holes Here (NAH) here.
“No, I see her point of view,” began the top comment, which received over 3,000 upvotes.
“From her perspective, you’ve got your dream job, and it must have taken a lot of hard work to succeed. Now you’re looking at a less desirable prospect from the outside. “She’s working a smaller job and has gained weight along with it,” the Redditor added, adding that the weight gain may be causing OP to “be depressed, lose motivation, and miss out on opportunities.” “I’m worried that his girlfriend might believe it,” he said.
“I think it’s a life partner’s role to at least be empathetic when you’re faced with a big life change like this. I can totally understand how upsetting that can be for you…but I don’t think she’s necessarily being shallow.” And I don’t think you’re asking what’s going on.” They added.
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Another commenter wondered if OP was considering a career change.
“Well, but. As someone who works in the restaurant industry for young men like you, I think host work can be a stepping stone for you. Many artists, performers, and models all work as hosts. “Working as a server/bartender, pursuing myself while supporting myself” dream. Are you doing hosting because you want a career in restaurants? Is it because your life is less stressful or because your life is “easier”? asked the Redditor.
“Well, it sounds like you worked as a model and loved it, but now you’ve found other joys. The job has different physical requirements than the job you were doing.” Yes, it is,” added another woman.
“But I don’t think your girlfriend is wrong. Your appearance will affect your ability to keep a job in the modeling industry,” they continued, adding an even response.
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“NTA. Firstly, it’s your body. If you’re happy with it and don’t complain about it all the time (and do nothing about it) then it’s your choice,” commented another. I read, and noted that “lifespan is very limited” on most models. “I don’t know if hosting is it, but I’m branching out and trying other things and finding out what I like and what I don’t like,” they added.
“However, she might not BTA for bringing it up either,” the person added. “Maybe she’s wondering if you’re really committed to that world anymore. I won’t say if she’s a part of that world, but if she’s deeply committed to that world… If you guys are just at that point in your life where the paths might start to diverge, it doesn’t mean either is wrong or it’s part of life. Not too much.”
What do you think?
